The Rogue Stitch

From the hearthside:

'Twas the week before finals and all through the school
1Ls were forgetting to celebrate Yule;
Outlines were pumping and eyes bugging out,
While Santa tried to figure what the matter was about;
Restatements were read over coffee and tea,
And civilians exclaimed that lawyers they'd rather not be;
The 3Ls were content all smug in their beds,
While visions of big firms danced in their heads;
2Ls in the middle, like Jan Brady or a monkey,
Kindly gave us the outlines we need like crack to a junkie.
When out of nowhere there arose such a clatter,
And the Rogue Stitcher sprang forth to tackle the matter.
"Cheer them all up," I thought as I snickered,
"Then we can discuss contract terms which were dickered."
So away to the blog I retired with pics
To post and make fun of these poor ol' Saint Nicks:



I like the second one (happy, angry and scared shitless).
The third is kinda disturbing; Santa looks like a drunk Russian peasant (no offense to my fans in the Motherland).
Check this one out and ask yourself, "Who's the bigger baby?"........



Actually, Santa's mind is elsewhere in this one....

He's thinking about the night before....

Yup, definitely the night before:



Damn, the elves just keep getting better and better looking:



But that's not what Christmas is about. The season is meant for families....



and celebrating the birth of Christ with friends.......



and enjoying the moment............



errrrrrrrrrr, and swimming pools............



Whoa, I digress.

Christmas is about carols and eggnog and sleigh rides and crackling fires and snow and spices and candycanes and ice skating and that fresh pine tree smell and nutcrackers and Tiny Tim and Jimmy Stewart and red rider bb guns and the island of misfits and Jon Favreau...Jon Favreau?



Wow, he probably should have waited on Elf for a few years and then played Santa himself.

Christmas is about gingerbread and sugar plums and Good King Wenceslas and Jack Frost and Comet and Cupid and Donner and mistletoe kisses and the little drummer boy and the Arthur Andersen office party and wool-knit hats and ties for dad and writing letters to Christopher Walken and Mr. Hankey and leaving out a glass of milk for the Jolly One....



Oh, I see. VSOP. Go on, playa; Diddy can't be the only one throwin' down for the holidays:



And if you're checkin' that list, I'll take one of those coats (fur is murder my ass).... and the elf in red. Thanks, dawg.

Merry Christmas y'all.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 29, 2005 at 9:31 PM. You can skip to the end and leave a response.