From the U.S. Supreme Court:
Oh, God. Here we go. A law student and the Supreme Court. This should be interesting...
So, over the last couple of months, I've vented a bit--attacking the absurdities of Mormonism, Scientology, and the like. And it was fun. Hail, Xenu. But don't you--my faithful readers--feel like something is missing? What about Kabbalah? Like I left some group out? What about NAMBLA? Like I need to bring it back to the old school and drop a dago like Jim Malone? (there's a bit of cinematic esoterica for ya.)
Call it the responsibility of any good Irishman to take offense to the very existence of those guinea-guido-wop fucks out there. Wow, did he just combo a troika of ethnic slurs? Oh yeah, that's right; they don't count when you aim them at white people from New Jersey.
I wouldn't even know where to begin with these meatballs. Your grandfather would have taken youze out back and beaten youze with a rubber hose, btw.
And no, I'm not about to go after Samuel Alito. That was supposedly Congress' job.
Scalia, on the other hand, is fair game. This terrone has been all over the news lately.
First, he declared anyone believing in a "living Constitution" to be an "idiot." Thank you, Mr. Originalist. What can possibly be said, Nino, about someone who clings to a textualist interpretation of an antiquated document and tells people to change the law (via legislation) if they don't like it? Too much faith in a poorly-oiled system, goomba. We don't all have an Abramoff to get things done. If we had a government of statesmen serving the people--and not Ralph Reeds and Tom DeLays serving their own interests--you'd have a point.
Then came the home video of you all fired up over foreign detainees. "War is war," you said. (yeah, i might agree with you on this one.)
And just recently did you truly let your guido soul glow, offering this gesture from the Cathedral of the Holy Cross, of all places:
Get this: Nino's at a special mass for lawyers (ha!) and a reporter asks him how he responds to critics who question his impartiality as a judge. Nino then looks into the camera, gives it the I-talian salute, and says, "Vaffanculo."
What do you think this phrase means in Italian? Come on now; anyone with the slightest training in a Romance language should recognize the root "cul."
Wouldn't it be great to have a Supreme Court justice drop the f-bomb on you? Almost as good as the vice president. (see previous posts)
That reminds me; there's this great insult in French: Va te faire enculer chez les Grecs!
Turns out that Scalia immediately recognized the inappropriate nature of his comment, and said to the reporter, "You're not going to print that, are you?" Oops.
That's what you get for acting like a fool in church. You forgot to ask WWJD? Hey, how do you think Scalia reacted when the cardinals chose a German to be pontiff?
Speaking of the Teutons, the Stitch will be studying in Europe this summer, and will hopefully make it over to Deutschland for some World Cup action. And perhaps some beer drinking with the native frauen.
To the faux-blonde on the right, I say: Soll ich dich einem Sommertag vergleichen? Er ist wie du so lieblich nicht und lind...Ich liebe dich.
My high school friend Ian came up with the idea of Guido Poetry, because that accent waxing eloquent is just too good. My contribution started with, "Shall I compare thee to a Chevrolet?" I can understand your attraction for the Bierfrauen - nice knobs. You also sprechen sie, mein froschliehaber?
And Gretchen's in Law School, too? Great, just one more reason she's better than me. Go ahead, rub it in.
December the what?
As for your antics of terror towards the JW's - hilarious. Your etymological approach would never work with me; I love that shit. That "eye of the needle" parable (or is that aphorism?), never worked for me until I read that "camel" was mistranslated from an (aramaic?) word meaning "coarse thread." So, not impossible for a rich man to get into heaven, just difficult. So much better, but I don't believe in begrudging the affluent their money.
(oh, and sign me up for your seminar on Rogue spirituality, I promise perfect attendance.)
I might begrudge the Catholic Church its money a little. Dangerous for all the historical reasons - imperialistic and bloody little church it was. But my attraction for it is immense; it's the most seductive religion in Christendom - robustly sensual, ritualistic, all that paganism and femininity hiding behind the names of saints, the inclusion of a female quasi-deity. The music's magic, the architecture steals your breath, the Sacrament's baroque in its detail, and there is smoke and there are little boxes where you whisper your secrets to the man behind the veil...
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