From a dark room redolent of death, and perhaps sandalwood:
So, a few people got together the other day to hold a sceance and channel some spirits. Now, normally the Stitch wouldn't be the least bit interested in the story, but the event took place at an Upper West Side cafe called La Fortuna:
Ah, the story gets better. Turns out the cafe was a favorite of a particular musician.
Wait a minute, I recognize those glasses--and unfortunately the Asian woman as well.
Yes, that's right. The group tried to channel the spirit of John Lennon--and now claims to have succeeded.
And you can experience the event yourself for only $9.95.
Forget that gas will soon hit a national average of $3.00. Forget that mortgage rates are on the rise; forget the present war in Iraq has cost about $275.5 billion to date. Forget that social security is approaching insolvency. Forget all your financial worries and please waste ten bucks on an expoitative pay-per-view special that promises to delivery EVPs (Electronic Voice Phenomena) through which John will speak out from the land of the dead.
Imagine that.
For those of you actually interested in what John has to say after 25yrs, send me the cash through Paypal and channel his spirit yourself through this simple DIY guide.
In the wake of the Stuart "Mickey" Wiles scandal, Ben & Jerry's is sporting yet another black eye this week. Turns out a few people are upset with the new flavor Black & Tan:
As some (though not enough) of you probably know, the term Black & Tan traditionally refers to auxiliary members of the Royal Irish Constabulary Reserve Force. The na Dúchrónaigh were nothing more than British paramilitary thugs who spilt Catholic blood on Catholic soil in the two years leading up to southern independence.
The B&J's spokesman, of course, apologized, saying the company was built on the philosophies of peace and love.
All I know is that I'll be getting two free cones on Free Cone Day--else I shall avenge the violence suffered by my people.
Come out ye Black & Tans!
Come out and fight me like a man.
Show your wife how you won medals down in Flanders.
Tell her how the IRA
made you run like hell away
From the green and lovely lanes of Killeshandra!
This entry was posted
on Sunday, April 23, 2006 at 8:33 PM.
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